It occurred to me not to long ago as I assessed my life.... I thought back to the days of my youth... I searched my memory vault... Thinking about those that were then young with me... Looking at the roads we have walked on and how different our lives had turned out....
Death took a few, life's hardship had demoralized and destroyed a few.... We all started out so innocent... so full of promise and expectations...... If only we could journey and tell I then self to take time to grow, take time to make decisions...
Knowing my then self, I would not have listened to me..........
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For many days I night I dwell outside of myself.... Trying to be other than the person that I knew I was.... Being there for others and neglecting me and the things that make me happy... during those moments of unhappiness I found myself alone. I dwelt in my own loneliness until I woke up... I spoke to myself and said FOCUS ON ONLY ME... Be my old self...
I took this advice and I found myself once again..... I was outdoing myself for others who appreciated nothing.... I was extending myself without meaning... I have wheeled it all back in....
I tried greatly to be but I could not anymore be so inclined....
It's all about me... I am focused inward.now
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